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Dear Fifteen Year Old

06.03.12 By Lindsey G 6 Comments

Dear 15 year old son,

It has become glaringly apparent that my time with you is quickly coming to a close. No matter how much love a fifteen year old thinks he does or does not need, is irrelevant. You can never love a child too much. I am your biggest fan. I have always said from day one that you were and still are a pure joy to have. You were the easiest baby. You ate, slept and smiled all day long. Fifteen years later not much has changed. No one prepared me for what’s coming. No one told me that my heart would feel so full and heavy at the same time. As I slowly begin to release the grips and ease into the change happening I want you to know that I will always love you. You may not let me let me show you as much anymore but it’s there if you look.

kids-at-crystal-cove-beach

story behind photo on flickr

It’s in your bed when I fall asleep watching you attempt to land 747s. It’s in the car when I let you replace my Duran Duran with DubStep. It’s at the computer superstore when we conspire to build you the most awesome gaming machine. It’s at 10 o’clock when you really REALLY want bacon and eggs after dinner and in that spoonful of cookie dough I save just for you. It’s in the extra car trip to deliver your forgotten Lacrosse stick. It’s when I let you bring reptiles into the house especially when I buy live feeders for said pets.  It’s from the bleachers where I scream “GO SUPER B!”.  It’s at 3 am when you need a ride home from the midnight movie premiere.  It’s behind the camera where patiently wait for the crack of a smile and when I put the camera down because you have had enough. It’s from the other side of the door when I know you need space. And contrary to belief its  definitely when I take you offline and bring you outside. I hope you can see how much I love being your mom.

donuts-you-are-special-red-plate

Special doesn’t even begin to cover it kid.

Happy 15th Birthday Super B.

love, mom

Filed Under: Family Tagged With: Instax, Super B, teen

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. The Bombshell says

    06.03.12 at 3:13 pm

    Happy birthday to your awesome son!

    Reply
  2. Jen @ LitasWorld says

    06.03.12 at 7:26 pm

    AWESOME post!!! Happy Birthday Super B!

    Reply
  3. mosey (kim) says

    06.03.12 at 8:59 pm

    Oy. Thanks for sharing the trauma of what the letting go process is all about. Happy birthday to your boy, and well done, Mama.

    Reply
  4. mau says

    06.03.12 at 9:38 pm

    Happy birthday to your son, he does sound special! (ps- I’m crying into my coffee reading your post)

    Reply
  5. Leslie says

    06.04.12 at 11:52 am

    That was such a touching post you made me cry! I can’t believe it’s been 15 years since I was forced into videotaping him making his premiere debut! (I’m happy you did 😉 ….) I love that kid 🙂 You’re right, he is special XOXOX, Auntie

    Reply
  6. Shari says

    08.24.12 at 7:18 pm

    Lindsey, you made me cry! What a gift this post is. I know he will treasure it when he’s older (and maybe even now).

    Reply

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What began as a blog about an unexpected pregnancy at midlife morphed into a (sometimes) steady stream of private thoughts made public. I've moved from blogs to photography and now astrology. ... more about the journey here.

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